{"title":"Featured Collection","description":"\u003cp\u003eHome Page 3 Product Line\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"blight-sticker-3-x-4","title":"Blight - Vinyl Sticker [3\" x 4\"]","description":"\u003cp\u003eAdvisor Notes - Blight [B-T351]\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\"\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 0.875rem;\"\u003eWhat do you mean “stole” your blood? Advisor 2, if I have to tell you to curb your hyperbole one more time, we are going to have a very different conversation.. \u003c\/span\u003eNO i don’t care that it itches! Look, we all know it’s going to get worse, at least find that tenant BEFORE you collapse this time. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003cem\u003eUpdate 1: Mixing vinegar and Salt in a warm solution halts agitation from tenant bite.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cem\u003eUpdate 2: Advisor 2 has gone missing. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003eApplications have been sent to potential replacements.\u003c\/em\u003e\"\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e-A7\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"3\" x 4\" \/ Kiss-Cut \/ Satin","offer_id":59598735245393,"sku":"49873363330059453890","price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1046\/0735\/0865\/files\/Hero_1f513424-91a2-4e05-860d-0e35861ee9dc.png?v=1780690605"},{"product_id":"classic-dad-cap","title":"Jasmine - Embroidered Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-sheets-root=\"1\"\u003eAdvisor Notes - Jasmine [B1K-KT]\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\"\u003cem\u003eAdvisor 2, I told you to take that cigarette away from her. What do you mean you did, I'M LOOKING RIGHT AT IT! I'll just do it myself then, so hard to find good lab techs these da.. where did she get that one from- how did she even light it?\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eUpdate 1: It's been 4 hours and Jasmine is up 35 cigarettes.. Like she's manifesting them out of spite. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eUpdate 2: We finally saw her light one - Turns out Jasmine.. the cat.. is a low level pyromancer, capable of producing a localized flame. Note from Advisor 3: 'She singed my fingers when I took the last one out of her mouth.. is that worker's comp?' No.\u003c\/em\u003e\" \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e-A7\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e.: 100% cotton\u003cbr\u003e.: Closure: Self-fabric hideaway strap with antique brass buckle and grommet\u003cbr\u003e.: Sewn-in label\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"One size \/ Dark Grey","offer_id":59641995624529,"sku":"19784812711707245271","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"One size \/ Khaki","offer_id":59641995657297,"sku":"14976003903757820787","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"One size \/ Light Blue","offer_id":59641995690065,"sku":"17797179902455080388","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"One size \/ Pink","offer_id":59641995722833,"sku":"28809271942116923295","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"One size \/ Stone","offer_id":59641995755601,"sku":"17466788126822551368","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"One size \/ White","offer_id":59641995788369,"sku":"30856957951036302600","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1046\/0735\/0865\/files\/Embroider_Hat.png?v=1781282935"},{"product_id":"blight-t-shirt","title":"Blight - T-shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003eAdvisor Notes - Blight [B-T351]\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\"\u003cem\u003eWhat do you mean “stole” your blood? Advisor 2, if I have to tell you to curb your hyperbole one more time, we are going to have a very different conversation.. NO i don’t care that it itches! Look, we all know it’s going to get worse, at least find that tenant BEFORE you collapse this time. \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003eUpdate 1: Mixing vinegar and Salt in a warm solution halts agitation from tenant bite.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eUpdate 2: Advisor 2 has gone missing. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003eApplications have been sent to potential replacements.\u003c\/em\u003e\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e-A7\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e.: Heavyweight fabric (6.1 oz\/yd² (206.8 g\/m²))\u003cbr\u003e.: Pre-shrunk 100% ring-spun US cotton\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Bay \/ S","offer_id":59642104971345,"sku":"15553658019259410834","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ S","offer_id":59642105004113,"sku":"54665968380058541789","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":59642105036881,"sku":"17927735808345924122","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ M","offer_id":59642105069649,"sku":"23757130006930030439","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ M","offer_id":59642105102417,"sku":"10925191324386837449","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":59642105135185,"sku":"16983730795981654351","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ L","offer_id":59642105167953,"sku":"22865658218361969353","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ L","offer_id":59642105200721,"sku":"18268605084850298135","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":59642105233489,"sku":"20876024170442245998","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ XL","offer_id":59642105266257,"sku":"28170741606287585179","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ XL","offer_id":59642105299025,"sku":"27620779428189948171","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":59642105331793,"sku":"20909540708766603611","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 2XL","offer_id":59642105364561,"sku":"26362110389543139514","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ 2XL","offer_id":59642105397329,"sku":"24056885888297877040","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1046\/0735\/0865\/files\/Shirt.png?v=1781215188"},{"product_id":"blight-hat","title":"Blight - Hat","description":"\u003cp\u003eAdvisor Notes - Blight [B-T351]\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\"\u003cem\u003eWhat do you mean “stole” your blood? Advisor 2, if I have to tell you to curb your hyperbole one more time, we are going to have a very different conversation.. NO i don’t care that it itches! Look, we all know it’s going to get worse, at least find that tenant BEFORE you collapse this time. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eUpdate 1: Mixing vinegar and Salt in a warm solution halts agitation from tenant bite.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eUpdate 2: Advisor 2 has gone missing. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003eApplications have been sent to potential replacements.\u003c\/em\u003e\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e-A7\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e.: 8.5 oz., 100% cotton\u003cbr\u003e.: Enzyme washed twill, brushed finish\u003cbr\u003e.: Unstructured, six-panel, mid profile\u003cbr\u003e.: Self-fabric inside sweatband\u003cbr\u003e.: Self-fabric closure with metal slider\u003cbr\u003e.: 100% US grown BCI cotton.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Blue Jean \/ Adjustable","offer_id":59642110083153,"sku":"13322957583894463008","price":28.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sandstone \/ Adjustable","offer_id":59642110115921,"sku":"28324641497838582668","price":28.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ Adjustable","offer_id":59642110148689,"sku":"15700608833211938411","price":28.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ Adjustable","offer_id":59642110181457,"sku":"12209106522418774639","price":28.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Orchid \/ Adjustable","offer_id":59642110214225,"sku":"88632764726223907361","price":28.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1046\/0735\/0865\/files\/Hat.png?v=1781215811"},{"product_id":"the-birds-work-for-the-bourgeoisie-t-shirt","title":"The Birds Work for the Bourgeoisie - T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-sheets-root=\"1\"\u003eAdvisor Notes - The Birds: A.K.A. Government Spies \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\"\u003cem\u003eI know they're watching me.. turning their little heads like clockwork, every 40 seconds. listen.. LISTEN! ... those aren't 'coos', they are sending our coordinates back to HQ. DON'T LOOK! They scan your eyes for a genetic lock, that's when the surveillance really begins. You see, they start flapping to recharge their batteries and... hey.. HEY LET GO! DON'T YOU COME NEAR ME WITH THOSE RESTRAINTS! I KNOW WHAT I SAW! I KNOW WHAT I SA-\u003c\/em\u003e\" \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e-Advisor 4\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e.: Heavyweight fabric (6.1 oz\/yd² (206.8 g\/m²))\u003cbr\u003e.: Pre-shrunk 100% ring-spun US cotton\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Bay \/ S","offer_id":59645413032017,"sku":"21793151952693023539","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ S","offer_id":59645413064785,"sku":"32137248343992303377","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ S","offer_id":59645413097553,"sku":"49078254115447795550","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":59645413130321,"sku":"92188159550290158417","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ M","offer_id":59645413163089,"sku":"23714795449566688690","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ M","offer_id":59645413195857,"sku":"33153339334300748646","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ M","offer_id":59645413228625,"sku":"28826792968825309275","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":59645413261393,"sku":"16599142901063841908","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ L","offer_id":59645413294161,"sku":"15052009032212967604","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ L","offer_id":59645413326929,"sku":"25926435813844600220","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ L","offer_id":59645413359697,"sku":"25008545575103869255","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":59645413392465,"sku":"24753317749877046895","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ XL","offer_id":59645413425233,"sku":"21296227269488824380","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ XL","offer_id":59645413458001,"sku":"22584429140137433991","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ XL","offer_id":59645413490769,"sku":"25303967419483996417","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ XL","offer_id":59645413523537,"sku":"30079613418258971520","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":59645413556305,"sku":"11410523959452911736","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 2XL","offer_id":59645413589073,"sku":"18271726612476813272","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Chambray \/ 2XL","offer_id":59645413621841,"sku":"21986580866359259477","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ 2XL","offer_id":59645413654609,"sku":"13944443961554266226","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 2XL","offer_id":59645413687377,"sku":"22117514269289387159","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1046\/0735\/0865\/files\/Front_White.png?v=1781290768"},{"product_id":"jasmine-embroidered-beanie","title":"Jasmine - Embroidered Beanie","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-sheets-root=\"1\"\u003eAdvisor Notes - Jasmine [B1K-KT]\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\"\u003cem\u003eAdvisor 2, I told you to take that cigarette away from her. What do you mean you did, I'M LOOKING RIGHT AT IT! I'll just do it myself then, so hard to find good lab techs these da.. where did she get that one from- how did she even light it?\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eUpdate 1: It's been 4 hours and Jasmine is up 35 cigarettes.. Like she's manifesting them out of spite. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eUpdate 2: We finally saw her light one - Turns out Jasmine.. the cat.. is a low level pyromancer, capable of producing a localized flame. Note from Advisor 3: 'She singed my fingers when I took the last one out of her mouth.. is that worker's comp?' No.\u003c\/em\u003e\" \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e-A7\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e.: 50% recycled polyester and 50% acrylic\u003cbr\u003e.: Double layer knit\u003cbr\u003e.: Cuffed beanie\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"One size \/ Acid Green","offer_id":59645416407121,"sku":"74917625437320766480","price":28.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"One size \/ Beige","offer_id":59645416439889,"sku":"56045095754134774636","price":28.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"One size \/ Light Blue","offer_id":59645416472657,"sku":"19320424236114467625","price":28.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"One size \/ Light Grey Melange","offer_id":59645416505425,"sku":"16063905133185044246","price":28.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1046\/0735\/0865\/files\/Beanie.png?v=1781568426"},{"product_id":"jasmine-embroidered-t-shirt","title":"Jasmine - Embroidered T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan data-sheets-root=\"1\"\u003eAdvisor Notes - Jasmine [B1K-KT]\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\"\u003cem\u003eAdvisor 2, I told you to take that cigarette away from her. What do you mean you did, I'M LOOKING RIGHT AT IT! I'll just do it myself then, so hard to find good lab techs these da.. where did she get that one from- how did she even light it?\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eUpdate 1: It's been 4 hours and Jasmine is up 35 cigarettes.. Like she's manifesting them out of spite. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eUpdate 2: We finally saw her light one - Turns out Jasmine.. the cat.. is a low level pyromancer, capable of producing a localized flame. Note from Advisor 3: 'She singed my fingers when I took the last one out of her mouth.. is that worker's comp?' No.\u003c\/em\u003e\" \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e-A7\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e.: Heavyweight fabric (6.1 oz\/yd² (206.8 g\/m²))\u003cbr\u003e.: Pre-shrunk 100% ring-spun US cotton\u003cbr\u003e.: Sewn-in label\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":59645419421777,"sku":"13895801310693036939","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ S","offer_id":59645419454545,"sku":"22783345663647164833","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ S","offer_id":59645419487313,"sku":"81863805554900194970","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ S","offer_id":59645419520081,"sku":"16703162488265638771","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ S","offer_id":59645419552849,"sku":"11522886265749362965","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ S","offer_id":59645419585617,"sku":"23418002406356478414","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":59645419618385,"sku":"96199377546635942181","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ M","offer_id":59645419651153,"sku":"15584316267004959813","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ M","offer_id":59645419683921,"sku":"92291235924695122000","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ M","offer_id":59645419716689,"sku":"78781371847230860041","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ M","offer_id":59645419749457,"sku":"21925573370046392548","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ M","offer_id":59645419782225,"sku":"32444999808418921594","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":59645419814993,"sku":"30196877366345017736","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ L","offer_id":59645419847761,"sku":"10766005607563043769","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ L","offer_id":59645419880529,"sku":"73195966126310964469","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ L","offer_id":59645419913297,"sku":"25366465166023946812","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ L","offer_id":59645419946065,"sku":"14447386810564514841","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ L","offer_id":59645419978833,"sku":"23856287110993049866","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":59645420011601,"sku":"29414572281083103908","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ XL","offer_id":59645420044369,"sku":"16340420674393810463","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ XL","offer_id":59645420077137,"sku":"12329760653734146647","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ XL","offer_id":59645420109905,"sku":"17422597787494260042","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ XL","offer_id":59645420142673,"sku":"12542121612940544007","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ XL","offer_id":59645420175441,"sku":"21378030335677867263","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":59645420208209,"sku":"15943998988945423420","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ 2XL","offer_id":59645420240977,"sku":"17083589585880948550","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 2XL","offer_id":59645420273745,"sku":"16031125888723285686","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Blossom \/ 2XL","offer_id":59645420306513,"sku":"42637084037978872965","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 2XL","offer_id":59645420339281,"sku":"44926840411152535238","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki \/ 2XL","offer_id":59645420372049,"sku":"30717197966196613054","price":32.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1046\/0735\/0865\/files\/Embroider_Shirt.png?v=1781298166"},{"product_id":"blight-enamel-mug","title":"Blight - Enamel Mug","description":"\u003cp\u003eAdvisor Notes - Blight [B-T351]\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\"\u003cem\u003eWhat do you mean “stole” your blood? 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Do not microwave\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"12oz \/ Black Rim","offer_id":59754184966225,"sku":"56525620989789374768","price":18.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1046\/0735\/0865\/files\/Enamel_Mug_3175897a-0490-47d2-9ced-fbd229d2e9cd.png?v=1783365462"},{"product_id":"knife-prawn-vinyl-sticker-3-x-4","title":"Knife Prawn - Vinyl Sticker [3\" x 4\"]","description":"\u003cp\u003eAdvisor Notes - Knife Prawn [N1F-SHMP]\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\"\u003cem\u003eThis is not the way we do things around here Advisor 3. You signed the contract, you bear the risks. Advisor 5 will be missed to be sure, but each piece of her needs to be recovered from that tank so we can mail it back to next of kin. Now reach into the enclosure, pull out that prawn, and DO. YOUR. 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